| Thoughts of a Growing Christian | |||
|
Wednesday, February 13, 2002 Tomorrow will be Valentine's Day. I still have yet to decide is it a Hallmark Holiday or not? I am currently 18 and I have not yet kissed anyone...had a boyfriend...etc. Sometimes I feel so behind and so pathetic. But is it really? I am so fickle on my opinions with this. I annoy myself at times. I sulk about being single and wanting a boyfriend...but then being single has it's ups....right? *sigh* I don't know. For some reason this year Valentine's Day felt kinda different for me. I guess it all starts from the fact that I went to an all girls school for four years. And let me tell ya...when you go to an all girls school for four years...your "guy radar" gets really fine tuned. For example...here were all these girls and whenever there was someone of the male gender walking down the hall all the heads would turn to be like wha?...there's a guy in our school! It was pathetic. But anyways I also spent four years in Regina where I experinced Valentine's Day without anyone. And let me tell you...boy was it depressing. Especially when you'd see all these deliveries for girls...and candy grams would be sent (wrapped candy with messages from the brother schools). And really nothing ever really came for me. It was a bummer. I think eventually they announced that deliveries will not be accepted on Valentine's Day. But anyways this year when I came to college...I was looking forward to meeting people. And I don't believe I'm wrong in saying that I'm pretty friendly. So I have met tons of people. But I guess part of me was also looking for prospects...sounds stupid doesn't it? But I think it's because someone told me that you meet your future mate during these years. And if I were to reason it out it does make sense. Because I do hope to get married one day and say oh ideally around 25-26...but I also want to get to know him for awhile first and to become his close friend first and ALSO hopefully date him AWHILE before I marry him. So let's do some figuring...I'm nearly 19 and then say I meet this "future" him...become friends with him for about 3 years or so and then we started dating cause we developed feelings for each other...and we date for about 2-2.5 years...and then we decide to get married...and it takes nearly a half a year to put a marriage together...so it would be like adding 6 years onto my age...I would be twenty five! WHOA I need to get a MOVE ON! No no no...not really. But still this past weekend I was at a small wedding reception. And this couple had gotten married in Hong Kong. So they decided to have a small reception here and it was for close friends. And I realized my friends are getting to that age where they are getting married! Or if not you can tell who his or her future fiance will be. Whoa that's scary! Well at least I can compare myself to where I was last year. Last year's Valentine's Day is still really clear to me. I had some deep feelings for this person...and things were a mess...I cried/was frustrated/didn't know what to do...and I decided I was just gonna go to the theater and watch sappy movies with my teddy bear. That is so pathetic. But I ended up sleeping the whole day away. It was not a good day. But this year I've moved on...a little...and I must say that it wasn't entirely bad. I realized that Valentine's Day is fun with your friends too. At least they took my mind off of sulking. Oneday he'll show up....sooner or later....hopefully. posted by Sewa at 8:27:00 PM # |
|
||
